I have totally forgotten Reita's birthday!!!!!!!!
OMG I mean I've just read about it in Gazerock forum. My heart is right in my heels at the moment. How could've I? O____________________O;;
That is so inexcusable. I feel like crap.
Just now I trully realized how much these national exams affected me. I really AM like outta space..
I'm still shaking..
It's like when two years ago I remembered about my mother's birthday just one day before it..
Damn it.. and this year I almost forgot to congratulate ~3 people.
And now.. My super diva - REITA.
WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON WITH ME?!
I feel like crap.. I am crap..
And I'm like to be forced to live under London's bridges after a few months. I'm going crazy, people..
Life is too tough for me, I guess..
I so don't trust myself.. On Thursday I had an English lesson and I screwed up in such easy tasks.. But I was doing really well in the difficult ones.. And this year's tendencies say to me that English exam is going to be the easy one. So I'll screw up.
I feel sorry for spending money for English and History classes. I still didn't learn anything coz I was lazy and all in all I'm a no good person.
My place is under the fucking London bridges. You'll see.
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You are not a good for nothing person. You're not. You're a smart, but very sensitive girl who still surpasses many of my aquaintances and don't ever dare to say that your place s under bridges >;/ All humans tend to underesitamte themselves, hate themselves and they never see themselves in an objective way. Same goes with me, same goes with you or sa, we all hate they way we are, we constantly want to be different, we see only bad points in ourselves but that's not all. We fail to recognize our good points, our strength and we oh so lack self confidence. One of my favorite animes ever was " Fruits Basket" and they said one amazingly deep thing using a simple example. We are like onigiris with an umbeoshi on our backs ( you know what umbeoshi is and how it is stuck to one side of onigiri). We always see others' umeboshis, but we never see ours and feel bad, feel,t hat we're not good as others, that we're no good at all. But otehr poeple see beautiful umeboshis on our backs...
AtsakytiPanaikintiMistakes before exams tend to occur much more often that on normal basis, that is totally normal, same happened to me in consultations and I also felt bad, but hey, it doesn't eman that you'll do bad in the exam! The exam will be probably easier than those excercizes anyways, ebcause all the vllages are putting pressure on governement that with this new " krepseliai" system only city school will do good in ahrd state exams, therefore they've made exams easier this year so even provincial town students would have at elast soem chances to compete with us.
Don't worry, I beg you! I am now kind thankful to lyceum now that we had so many exams before, I have nos tress whatsover and I feel insecure therefore... I just have this bad intuition about exam results, because if I am not stressed, I probably don't try as hard eitehr, so I think being stressed is better :D
But not too much. yarisugi, as Japanese say :D
I hope you feel OK now, as you didn't reply my sms, but I hope you're now calmer.
I really love you and it pains me to see how depressed you are T___T it hurts, litterally and you know what it means....
Call me if you need something, advice, quesitons anything♥